Promise Without Envy
by xThe Painted Lady
Summary: Albus didn't know the importance of being an older sibling, not until Ariana's cries rocked the silence he knew so well.


_**A/N: **Written for My Dear Professor McGonagall's Mother and Child Competition on the HPFC Forum._

_Thanks to RubyRed.950 for beta-ing/editing this for me!_

_Ariana is baby in this story, Aberforth is one, and Albus is four._

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The cries of a newborn baby echoed through the house. The fire burning in the hearth crackled softly in mild air. The temperature in the room was nearing unbearable cold, and Kendra Dumbledore, who had been for the last few hours tending to her newborn child suddenly noticed the freezing air and had conjured up the flames only a while ago.

'_A little girl,'_ she thought. Kendra felt blessed; she had been deathly worried about what the child was going to turn out as. Of course, she couldn't care less by what gender the baby was, but after already having two sons the fear of giving birth to a squib had dissolved, and she had prayed for a little girl.

Setting down the bottle of formula on the small rugged coffee table, Kendra walked over to stroke the fire, humming softly and pleasantly as she did so. She then straightened up and lifted the crying baby off the sofa and placed her in her lap as she sat down in the same spot. Kendra began to hum a soft lullaby to Ariana as she fed her the bottle of formula.

The house was quiet. But little did Kendra know that her eldest was sitting on the staircase, watching her feed and rock Ariana from afar. Albus sat on the bare wooden steps listening to his mother hum to the baby in her arms, staring at the little creature that suckled the bottle strangely. Ariana had come into their lives only about a week ago. And Albus began to feel a strange tight tugging on his heart. It wasn't out of sadness, it wasn't out of pleasantness, and it wasn't out of happiness either.

Albus ran the few words he knew over in his mind. Trying to think of a way to distinguish what he was feeling as he watched his mother cradle the little girl in her arms. All he knew was that it burned. It burned in a way he had never felt before. It wasn't at all pleasant. It felt demeaning, it felt disgusting, and he didn't know why, or even what it was.

Albus leaned back on the steps, putting his legs up and wrapping his arms around them. He continued to listen to his mother's soft voice as she began to sing to Ariana. Albus remembered when she used to do that to him. He remembered how her soft, peaceful voice used to sing to him whenever he needed comfort.

Albus tried with all his might to push the sickening feeling away as Kendra's voice grew to a soft sort of whisper. He began to feel resentful to whatever was causing him to feel this way. Not that that made any sense to even himself. He didn't know what was causing him to feel this way.

Albus groaned and whimpered softly, burying his head in his arms.

"Who's there?" Kendra's voice echoed softly through the room beyond the staircase.

Albus gasped and snapped his head up. He began to hear footsteps walking through the house. Becoming louder and louder as the seconds passed. Quickly and quietly as he could, he got to his feet and ran up the stairs before Kendra could have a chance to find him on the steps.

Kendra made it to the bottom of the staircase. She knew it had come from there and was curious as to who might've been watching her. She stared up at the wooden steps where no one stood or was seated. Her face was framed with curiosity but confusion lined her thoughts. Who had been watching her? Who had made that sound?

Albus sat alone in his room, lying flat on the bed staring up at the blank, wooden ceiling. He had run straight up to his room and closed the door as softly as he could manage. Only now that he was alone did the strange feeling he had felt earlier go away, almost. Whatever it was, it still burned slightly. He tried desperately to figure out what it was, and what caused it. He hadn't begun to feel this way until his new little sister had come home.

Well, that was one thing. He hadn't felt this way until Ariana had come home. Perhaps she was the cause of it? But Albus didn't want to think like that. He tried to repress the feeling but it persisted. It must be Ariana, but how? What did a little baby that couldn't do anything cause him to feel something so strongly?

Albus lay there for a while, thinking about his father, who currently was away, and his brother, Aberforth, who was in the room next to him obviously sleeping.

Albus rolled on to his side and began to stare at the opposite wall. The room was bare, with only a closet full of necessary clothes, and a few small wooden toys.

'_Wood_' he thought. That seemed to be the only thing this house was._ Wood_. The floor was wooden, the ceiling was wooden, and even his and his brother's toys were wooden. The summers were always unbearably hot; the winters were always unbearably cold. Nothing ever seemed to be pleasant living in this old barely-standing house. The only thing that provided heat was the fireplace downstairs. And sometimes even that wasn't enough.

He got up off the bed and slid down to lean next to it. Reaching over and picking up a small, plush teddy bear. It had been sitting in the corner gathering dust for ages. Albus couldn't remember the last time he had slept with it. His mother had suggested he give it to Aberforth once he had come along. But even though it still sat untouched he refused to give it up.

Was that what it's supposed to be like? Did being the oldest of his two siblings mean giving all his stuff away? Aberforth had already been given Albus' old blanket. What else would he have to give to him? What would he have to give to Ariana?

A cry echoed up through the house and Albus winced as if a knife had just been shoved through his ears. Standing back up and throwing the teddy bear against the wall, he sat back down on the bed, crossing his arms. He turned and glared at the door in irritation, wincing every time Ariana screamed.

A few minutes passed until it sounded like Kendra finally managed to calm Ariana down. Albus heard footsteps coming up the stairs and he perked his head up, going into a position appropriate if his mother decided to come in.

A few minutes later, he heard the door to Ariana's nursery close. Kendra seemed to have finally put her to bed. Albus felt spitefully thankful. The house was finally quiet again.

Albus saw the shadows of a pair of feet near his bedroom door. He watched them like a hawk. He didn't really know if he wanted his mother to come in or not. He saw the shadows disappear and let out a breath he didn't know he was holding, half-happy half-disappointed that Kendra had gone away.

Albus lay back down on his bed, again, staring up at the blank, wooden ceiling. He closed his eyes, thinking he may as well just go to sleep seeing as it was so late. But then, he felt his stomach lurch as he heard his mother's voice.

"Albus?"

"Mum!" Albus whipped his head up, trying and failing to look calm as he looked into her face for a brief second before falling out of his bed. He hit the floor with a loud thump and prayed that he hadn't woken either of his siblings.

Albus groaned as he tried to lift himself off the floor. But Kendra had already gripped his shoulders and pulled him into a sitting position.

"Are you alright, dear?" she asked softly, looking at the bruise that had begun to form on Albus' forehead.

"Yes," said Albus, even though he winced when Kendra touched his bruise.

"Hold still, dear," she said, pulling out wand and pointing it at his forehead.

Albus recoiled.

"What are you going to do?" he said, sounding slightly panicked. His mother had never used magic on him before.

"Don't worry," she said soothingly, "It won't hurt." Kendra jabbed her wand at her son's bruise, and Albus could feel the skin tightening as it healed. Kendra then put her finger up to where the bruise was and pressed hard.

"Does it still hurt?" she asked.

"No," Albus replied, wondering why his mother felt the need to press on his head. Kendra pulled her hand away and then stowed her wand back in the pocket of her robes. She then turned, and looked Albus full in the face.

"What?" Albus said, after a moment.

"Was that you, who were on the steps? Watching me?" Kendra asked, and she smirked slightly when she saw Albus' face turn beet red. Kendra got to her feet and closed the door behind them. She then walked to Albus' bedroom window and closed the curtains around it.

Turning back around to face her son, she looked at him, and then reached down to pick up the teddy bear he had thrown across the room. Kendra knew Albus barely even touched this bear anymore, and to see that it moved made her think at least something was up. Especially since it looked like it had been thrown.

Kendra walked over to Albus and crouched down to kneel in front of him.

"I got this when you were Ariana's age," she said, not looking at him, but turning the bear over in her hands and staring at it, "Amazing how long ago that seems." Albus stared at her.

"Why do make me give my stuff away?" he asked. Kendra looked up from the bear.

"Well, that's what being a big brother is about," she said, and Albus felt a familiar sense of anger rise up in him. So it was?

"It is?" he said, "That's it? You mean-"

"I mean," Kendra looked pointedly at him, "That it means being responsible, it means being a good role model, and it means looking after your brother and sister."

"But, isn't your and dad's job?" Albus asked.

"Yes. But we can't do it all by ourselves can we?" Kendra replied, "You should be honored to have this responsibility dear."

"But I never wanted to be a big brother!" Albus half-yelled, but his expression changed completely when he saw the look on his mother's face after those words. For the first time all evening she looked angry.

"I, I didn't mean that," he said, feeling his face burning. Kendra sighed, putting the bear back on the floor and turning her head to look pointedly at her son.

"I know you don't like it," she said, "But it's your responsibility to be a good role model, especially to your brother Aberforth." Albus stared at his mother. Feeling like he wanted to just shrink away.

"Were you watching me downstairs?" Kendra asked, even though she already knew the answer. Albus nodded, although barely.

"You like having a little sister don't you?" she asked.

"Well, yeah, but-"

"But what?" Kendra asked.

"I just, remember all the times you used to do that stuff with me," Albus said, all rather quickly, sounding embarassed.

"What stuff?" Kendra persisted.

"Like, sing to me," he said.

"Well, you're a little old for that now don't you think?" she said.

"Well, maybe. But-"

"Just because I don't spend as much time with you as I used to dear, or do things that I used to, doesn't mean I still don't love you," said Kendra.

"But-" Albus stared at her.

"When you're older you'll understand," said Kendra, "Why don't you come see Ariana for me? You haven't really gotten a chance to see her have you?"

"Uh," Albus stuttered. Kendra got up and moved towards the door. Opening it, she looked back towards Albus and jerked her head for him to follow. Albus stood there for a moment. Before he sighed, and followed his mother out of the room and into Ariana's nursery.

Albus was now staring down at a fair skinned baby with soft blond hair, and the same blue eyes as him and his brother.

She looked beautiful. She had inherited his mother's hair and it matched perfectly with his father's blue eyes.

"She's pretty," he said.

"Yes, she is," Kendra said, looking down at the baby in her arms, "Do you want to hold her dear?" Albus didn't get a chance to answer, for his mother had already shoved Ariana in his arms.

He nearly toppled over with her weight. He thought a baby would be so light. Kendra quickly took Ariana out of his arms after seeing him struggle.

"She's heavy isn't she?" she said.

"I thought a baby wouldn't be so heavy," said Albus, and Kendra just smiled at him. Albus looked back down at the baby. He thought about asking his mother if she was squib, but something in the back of his mind told him it was a bad idea.

"You know Albus, if anything were to happen to both your father and I, I'm counting on you to protect both your siblings." Albus stared at her, then Kendra decided she try to put Ariana in Albus' arms once again. Albus expected the weight this time, and was able to steady himself once his mother had placed his little sister in his arms.

_'You know Albus, if anything were to happen to either your father and I, I'm counting on you to protect both your siblings' _Kendra's words rang in his head as he stared down at the pretty face. She looked so innocent.

"Don't worry," he whispered to Ariana as she opened her eyes to look up at him, "Nothing will happen to you. I promise."

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_**A/N:** My first time writing for Albus Dumbledore. XP Well I just kinda pictured Albus a little selfish when he was younger; he even admitted it in the books. So that's just kinda how I wanted to write him in this._

_Well, I hope you liked it and please review. Please? :3 But please be nice if something's wrong... Thanks for reading!_


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